Wang Dang Sweet, well you know.. Dallas 2010
Friends, 'Elks and Countrymen, lend me your ears and eyes for the story I have to tell about the 2010 Dallas show is not only shocking but dare I say, titillating. Ray and I not only saw the emergence of an up and coming band (please read Ray's write up on the band Arms of the Son) but we also watched Uncle Ted destroy Texas. It's kinda like the moment your realize your girlfriend's ex- boyfriend is the current UFC heavyweight champ and he and his boys want to have a word with you outside.
Photo 1. I have no idea why I took this fortuitous photo of Janice. I guess I was just overcome by how nice the 'Elk logo looks on her. What do you think?
Photo 2. A little known fact about our dear friend Janice is that she was a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader during their Super Bowl run in the 90's and now she is the captain of our squad. Boys don't hate, congratulate.
Photo 3. These two ladies are employed by the AFL's Dallas Vigilantes. They are two of twenty ladies responsible for raising morale in the unfortunate reality of a 70- 6 beatdown.
(well, they do bounce off walls in that type of football, you know) When we told these two ladies about the 'Elk cheerleading team, they where intrigued and proceeded to ask Ray and I about our compensation package. I went on to tell these two delightful young ladies about our comprehensive medical and dental plan and our private physician, Doctor Dukakis. He handles both the duties of doctor and dentist, but is an ex veterinarian with a slight neuro-degenerative disease or in layman's terms, "shaky hand syndrome". After telling the ladies this, for some reason they looked disinterested. I had to act fast, so I called Ray over to ease their worried mind. "Ray, show them your grill"
I said. "What", he asked. "Yeah really, show them your grill". "Okay", he replied. See ladies, I bet you've never seen a horse with a winning smile like that have you? They said they'll get back with me. Funny thing, it's been a month. I'm sure their really busy, right?
Photo 4. And you thought Elvis worked in the drive- through at Hardees? Nope, he lives in relative anonymity in Corvus, Texas. Ray and I asked the King about all the rumors and about the millions of sightings of him from all over the world: the UFOs and the marriage of his daughter to the King of Pop.
We also asked him if he would be making a new EP (no pun intended). Being a Southern man with the highest morals prohibited him for gossiping, but he did leave us with a few parting words of wisdom.. "Without a song, the day would never end, without a song, a man ain't got a friend. Without a song, the road would never bend, without a song. So I keep singing my song."
Photo 5. Not only was the Captain of our official 'Elk cheerleading squad at the show, the head of enforcement was there as well. You know him, you love him, the one and only Mr. Kevv-Dogg in the house.
Photo 6. This is our good friend Paul, of the Xcess Whiskey band. If you don't already know, Paul is the voice and the guitarist of the best Van Halen cover band on the planet, but I often wonder if he has contractual disputes with himself? Things that make you go hmmmmm....
Photo 7. This gentleman needs no introduction. He is the man behind the licks that launched a thousand guitarists in the 80's. I myself tried, in vain to learn "Mr.Scary"- good F'n luck. In this photo, George was kind enough to pose with this very rare guitar that, in-fact belonged to him in the 80's and is in the insert of "The Best of Dokken". This guitar now belongs to a personal friend of the 'Elk, who is serving our country in the Pacific Theater. Thank you, George and to you as well, Nick. You just got lucky.....
Photo 8. Isn't Bon Jovi looking for this jacket?
Photo 9&10. Here is photographic evidence of Ted Nugent and Derek St. Holmes playing together and it takes me right back to the T-N-T tour of 1978. "Stranglehold" never sounded better. Now if Ted would only strap on a Byrdland again- some things were not made to be tampered with. It's kinda like Joe Montana playing soccer or Burt Reynolds without that 70's 'stach....