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Alan Scarborough
Alan Scarborough
Item Purchased: 2007 NAMM '57 RI Stratocaster

We knew Alan was an engineer even before he showed up to the 'Elkcave to look at some Strats this beautiful past Sunday afternoon. He's a Georgia Tech grad, so Lee and I brushed up on our technical terms in case our discussion turned to astrophysics or something like that. Anyway, Alan showed up and we pulled out some Strats for him to try and no matter what amp configuration we tried, he just couldn't seem to get the tone he was looking for. We showed him reissues, relics, Custom Shops and even vintage examples, but nothing worked. After a while, Alan said, "I know what the problem is. Shorty, bring me a paperclip, a rubber band, a styrofoam cup, a metal tag off your dog's collar, some Gorilla glue and a large glass of sweet tea". I looked at Lee, somewhat puzzled but with a shrug of my shoulders, went to retrieve the items. I returned with the things Alan had asked for and he immediately went to work, gluing and twisting and bending these items together. When he had finished, he had what looked like a clown hat with metal thing-a-ma-bobs sticking out of it and he said, "Plug this into the effects return of that amp". Still not quite sure what was going on, we plugged this kooky contraption into the amp, Alan started playing and for no apparent reason, my wife, who was upstairs in the kitchen burst into tears. My dog got up in the next room, walked over to Alan, curled up next to his feet and for the first time in 9 years, Lee and I were rendered speechless. It was the sweetest Strat tone we had ever heard in our lives and after playing a few minutes, Alan said, "I'll take it", got up, shook our hands and left, just like that. Lee and I just sat there, looking at each other and this thing sticking out of the back of the amp, scared to touch it. What neither of them know is that if you take this little gadget and plug it into the cable source at the top on your telephone pole, you can receive the entire NFL package, HBO, Showtime and the uncut, pre- satellite feeds of the Oprah show where she yells at her hairdresser and asks the audience if the dress she's wearing makes her look fat.

All things aside, Alan it was our pleasure meeting you and your wonderful family. We hope you enjoy this Strat for years to come and welcome to the "now getting expanded basic cable for free" 'Elk Nation.....